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Chapter Seventy Four
“I feel so guilty… I didn’t want any of it, but still it happened, and I can’t help but think that I don’t deserve you. I feel tainted…”
“Don’t say
that. He forced you; that was not your fault so don’t you blame yourself for anything. Maybe I do know a way to make you feel better and we will do this together. We are going to replace those memories of him with new ones. I will make you forget about him; you don’t have to be afraid.”
Thane kept to his promise; when he was done making love to me, he was all I could feel down there, all I could think about.
He lay beside me. It was already night time but we were both very much awake.
“What is your biggest fear?” I asked him, in the mood for a conversation after being away from him for so long.
“Can you guess?”
“Easy, the Lycan’s Curse.”
“That is one. When you were away with Daemon, I was afraid; I had an idea of what he would do, and I felt so restless, but my biggest fear is losing you.‘
“I will always be here; I am not going anywhere anytime soon.‘
“I want that, Riley.
When I was little, Slade had taught me to fear nothing you know why? He believes what you fear the most always ends up happening, and so if you fear nothing, you will be unstoppable.”
“He is wrong.”
“No, he is not. Somehow I always manage to let you slip out of my grasp, and you end up hurt. How do I protect this pack and the whole werewolves community when I can’t even keep my own mate from danger?
“You’ve saved me more times than I can count, and I would forever be grateful for that, but not all dangers are avoidable, so you can’t keep blaming yourself for everything.”
“You look tired; you should go to sleep.”
“You need to sleep too.” I said to him, but he shook his head. “I’d rather stay awake.” He said and I knew why he chose that; he didn’t want to lose control as he had before. With Isabella gone now, he could be a threat, but I would never see him as that.
“Thane. If anything happens to me due to the… curse, I don’t want you to blame yourself; I want you to know that you have my forgiveness…”
“Nothing will happen; I won’t let it.”
“But…”
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Chapter Seventy Four
“No buts. I would never be able to live with it. I know you will forgive me, but that wouldn’t make it easier. I will not forgive myself.”
I nodded; I was not going to push it, so I let it go.
any
THANE
“You keep jumping from one bad decision to another. Slade said to me.
“I’m in no mood to hear anything from you.” I responded, looking through the paperwork. There are many approvals I should have given by now, but they’re still pending. The last thing I needed was his fruitless little lectures.
“You should never have sent your mate away; you keep making wrong decisions, and all I can do is stand and watch.”
I smirked at him. “That is literally all you can do.”
“Listen to me, Riley has become a liability; she only brings threats to this pack and to you. Letting her go would have been the best decision. Think of it this way if you let her go, she won’t be used against you by your many enemies.”
“I tried that once.” I said, remembering when I did let Riley go, thinking that was the best decision, that had ended up an absolute disaster because I realized I couldn’t live without her, and then Nick was invited into the picture. That was a mistake I would never, ever make.
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