3
Menu
I paused, my
hand holding the soup made for me by Mrs. Johnson.”
bowl frozen in mid–air as I stared at him. “This was specially
Luke didn’t seem to hear me, rummaging through the cupboard for a lunchbox. “I know your condition; whether you drink chicken soup or not, it makes no difference.” “Let’s save this for Clara this time. Next time, I’ll take you to the state–run restaurant.” Familiar words from the past echoed.
Vivian, I
Clara the fabric coupons gave
Vivian, you don’t need to go to
one.
this time. I’ll get you some next month. to the party. Give your place to Clara. I’ll get you a ticket to the next
Vivian, Clara wants to meet my friends. Skip this veterans‘ gathering, I’ll take you next time.
Vivian…
So many “next times“, I couldn’t t even count them all.
While I was lost in thought, Luke filled the lunchbox with chicken soup and casually said, “I’m leaving now; take care of yourself at home.”
With that, he turned to leave, his coat brushing against the soup bowl on the table.
“Crash!” The bowl shattered, breaking along with my heart.
་
“Luke.” I called out, pulling out the jar with ninety–nine yellow beans from my pocket. “Ninety–nine beans. Count them.”
He paused, turning around in surprise. “Is it enough?”
I nodded. “Yes.”
He set down what he was holding, looking a bit troubled.
I remained silent, just wanting an answer.
As I expected, after a moment of hesitation, Luke said, “Vivian, Clara can’t be left alone…”
A flicker of guilt crossed his face, but he continued, “Our deal…is off.”
I lowered my gaze, letting out a soft sigh. “Fine.”
He was taken aback, unable to believe I agreed so easily. so easily. He hugged me tightly, excitement in his voice. “Vivian, you’re truly wonderful! Don’t worry; once Clara’s condition stabilizes, I’ll be there for you.”
I nodded, but I had one request.
“The baby is about to be born.” I said, “I want a safety lock.”
go
Mentioning the baby softened Luke’s expression even more. “Okay, when I come back, I’ll with you for the check–up and buy the best, most beautiful safety lock for our child.” My pupils trembled slightly, the pain of losing the baby crashing over me once more. “Okay.”
But my baby would never see it.
After he left, I opened a drawer, pulling out the neatly organized medical records.
13:13
The first confirmation of
The first check–up.
pregnancy.
Menu
The first time I received medication to protect the
pregnancy…
Every night when Luke wasn’t home, I would take them out and look at them repeatedly.
But now…
I pulled out the miscarriage report, trembling as I placed it alongside those documents. Tears fell, soaking the papers as if bidding farewell.
Making a deep breath, I was about to close the drawer when Luke’s voice suddenly came from behind me.
“What are you doing?”
I hurriedly shut the drawer, wiping away the tears from the corners of my eyes.
Luke approached, his gaze fixed on the drawer.
